Ultrasounds and Uncertainty

Back when I had my 22 week ultrasound, there was something I noticed. When both the tech and the doctor (who do separate ultrasounds) were checking the baby's heart, they spent longer than usual checking the blood movement. After the doctor was done, he asked that I come back in 6 weeks. He didn't say anything was wrong, just said that it was recommended that older moms get a followup ultrasound. When I was pregnant with River (and also considered an older mom), a followup ultrasound was mentioned, but just as an option, which I didn't take (I think we were going to be gone on vacation at that point).

Naturally, this had us a bit worried. We're guessing that the 22 week ultrasound was too early to tell for sure if something was wrong, hence the followup.

Adding to the worry that something was wrong: our changing insurance. Our current insurance is decent, but comes with copays, cost shares, and caps. Mr M's military job is changing, which will also change our insurance to one that doesn't involve copays or cost shares- everything is covered. Mr M and I both separately had the thought that maybe there's a reason for us needing the better insurance. We've agreed that this was not a reassuring thought when facing an unknown medical situation.

Possible heart problems were also in the back of my mind when I was trying to decide for sure about the half marathon. I did some research and couldn't find any evidence that exercising while pregnant affects the baby's blood flow negatively. But it was still a concern, since we just didn't know what might or might not be the problem.

On the bright side, not too long ago (but after the half) I found this article that described a study that shows that exercise during pregnancy reduces the number of heart defects in babies. So that was reassuring- at least I wasn't harming the baby or making things worse.

The General Conference Saturday Afternoon Session included a talk on fear and faith by Elder Bednar. As I listened to it, I considered whether I was afraid or not. I came to the conclusion that I wasn't afraid about what the future might hold for our baby, but I also recognized that it's easy to have that mindset since we hadn't actually received any bad news. The challenge would be holding off the fear even if we did receive bad news.

After 6 weeks of waiting, wondering, and praying, we had the follow-up ultrasound last week and:

Everything looks good! 

The doctor didn't see anything out of the ordinary and our little guy is growing properly. It's definitely a relief and it's nice to not have the uncertainty hanging over us anymore.

Regardless of the outcome, 6 weeks to contemplate all the "what-ifs" actually made the situation easier. We could calmly and rationally think about the ramifications and how we would handle things if the baby did indeed have heart problems. But at the same time, we could reassure ourselves that he was probably fine since the doctor hadn't said anything, which helped us not freak out too much. Honestly, we didn't stress too much about it all, though the last 18 hours before my appointment were a bit stressful as we approached the actual verdict.

Because we hadn't been told anything specific, we didn't tell our families since we didn't want to make a mountain out of a molehill. We didn't want to unnecessarily alarm them, but we also knew it would affect our support needs if there was a problem.

isn't he a cutie?

The week leading up to Valentine's Day is Congenital Heard Defect Awareness Week, and a blog I follow co-hosted a series of posts highlighting children with CHD and their families. At the time, when I read the stories, it wasn't on our radar that one of our kiddos might be in a similar situation. We never think something like that will happen to our family, and that was mentioned by several of the families writing about their experiences with CHD.

Back when we were filling out paperwork to adopt, one of the questionnaires asked which birth defects we were or weren't willing to consider in a potential adoptee. We talked about it and decided that we wouldn't place limits on a child we would adopt when there was no guarantee that a biological child wouldn't have those same issues.

When we got pregnant with River, people would ask if we wanted a girl or a boy, and we would answer that we didn't care, so long as the baby was healthy. After a while though, I stopped saying that because I realized that even a healthy baby isn't a given. Even if the baby had health issues, we would still love him/her, so using health as a criteria isn't truly indicative of how we would feel about our baby. Every child is a blessing, regardless of their state of health. And it's not like we're all super healthy and problem-free. Mr M has back issues, I have celiac and PCOS, Sunshine has celiac, and River has pectus excavatum. So we'll be happy with any addition we're blessed with :)

Patio Progress, part 2

this is what it looked like before- the deck blocks are just hanging out, asking to mangle bare little toes

Friday I squared off the frame. It's still not quite as square as I wanted (you can see the bobble in the frame on the outside long section), but at least the frame now extends to the edges of the concrete deck blocks. I didn't want them being super visible because they're ugly, but they also could be a hazard to people's toes.

To build out the frame, I screwed 2x4's onto the existing 2x6's. I couldn't use more 2x6's because the existing 2x6's are resting in the grooves of the deck blocks. The 2x4's are resting on the top portions of the deck blocks, with small spacers placed underneath to make up the height difference (only about 1/8-1/4 inch).

hard to tell from this angle, but the deck blocks aren't hanging out anymore,

the bobble in the center of the frame can be seen though

Then we went to Lowe's and bought 12 pieces (it's a manageable number of boards to move from the lumber cart at Lowe's onto the utility trailer, then off the trailer and to the patio) of 10' decking, which ended up giving me 8 rows with a small piece on the 9th row. I would have liked to have one solid piece of decking across the whole width, but I would have had to buy 16' boards and cut them down to 14', and we don't have any way of hauling lots of 16' boards home. So I went with 10' boards and alternated the joints so they weren't all in the same place.

four rows of decking installed,

plus a better view of the deck blocks

I only managed four rows on Friday before calling it quits to make dinner. I finished using the decking I had on Saturday afternoon during River's nap. If it hadn't started raining we would have made another Lowe's trip so I could do more on Monday, but that didn't happen.

eight rows of decking installed

I'd hoped to completely cover the section closest to the house, but didn't quite make it

I will say that the bending, straightening, and twisting did not make my hips happy, and led to some soreness Saturday morning during the race. Definitely a tactical error on my part to aggravate my hips right before a 5k. Live and learn, though, right?

it's starting to look like a real deck!

can't wait to use the power washer to clean all that red mud off the lower portions of siding and the doors- it won't be an issue anymore since the mud is now covered and won't splash up onto the house

I'm using our Kreg deck jig to fasten the decking to the joists, and it is easy to use and gives nicer results than just screwing in each board from the top. I had to do that on the board closest to the house because there wasn't clearance for the drill, and you can really tell the difference.

Keeping in mind that I have to keep the amount of wood I purchase at one time manageable, I'm hoping to finish the decking after two more trips to the hardware store. If I can, one of those trips will also include the wood to finish the pergola.  My goal is to finish the deck by this Saturday evening- hopefully the weather cooperates!

April 5k Recap

Since I didn't run the half marathon at the beginning of the month, I had to find a 5k in order to keep my goal of at least one race a month. I ended up signing up for the local fundraising 5k that I ran last year while pushing River. It was in our neighborhood last year, but this year they changed the location. While not as convenient, the course was much better. It was entirely on the golf cart paths of a golf course, which meant no vehicle traffic to deal with (a big factor in switching locations, I'm sure) and a serene setting. There were some fairly steep inclines and declines, but they were all fairly short, so weren't too problematic, and the middle portion of the race was all flat, which was super nice.

My original plan was to just walk the race, and maybe jog the downhills, but my internal competitiveness wouldn't allow it. That, and I was actually feeling pretty good. I haven't done any running in almost a month, and my body really appreciated the rest. I started jogging a few steps after the start, and it felt good, so I kept going. I ended up running about half of the race, and if I wasn't coming off a nasty bug I think I could have run more of it.

The main problem was the lack of energy and endurance due to being sick for the last few weeks. As a result, I wasn't able to run as long as I'd like to, but that's ok since I was really happy I was able to run at all. And since last Saturday I was barely able to stand upright, the fact that I was running a week later is tremendous. Oh, and I was pushing River in the jogger, too :)

So really, nothing to complain about other than the pollen in the air and the colder temps (45*) that aggravated my poor lungs and caused me to almost cough up a lung when I got in the warmer air of the car. The colder temps were nice for not overheating while running, though.

I mentioned last Monday that I was finally feeling better, and while that was true, it still took most of the week for me to really feel like I had any energy for anything. I had turned the corner from getting sicker and sicker, but my body still needed time to heal. I wanted to hit the treadmill, but decided to focus on resting and recuperating instead, since that's what I really need.

The race was an even 3.1 miles and I finished in 42:36. Definitely not my fastest time ever, but I did finish it while 28 weeks pregnant, pushing River in the jogger, and still recovering from a nasty bug. So I'm completely happy with my time. If the location is the same next year, I'm definitely looking forward to running this course again.

1st mile-  13:26
2nd mile- 13:14
3rd mile- 14:45 (I was definitely tired by the end of the race)

My May race is next week, which is not how I like my races spaced out, but having to change races didn't leave me any choice in the matter. And given how sick I've been the last few weeks I couldn't have done a substitute race any earlier.

-----------------

2015 races
April 5k          42:36      28 weeks pregnant, pushed River in the jogger
March 5k       35:32      22 weeks pregnant
February 5k  33:55       20 weeks pregnant
January 5k    33:25       12 weeks pregnant

Finding the Silver Lining in Unemployment

I mentioned Tuesday that I'd be sharing a couple posts about how we survived our second major unemployment period and what we've learned from the experiences.

Yesterday I talked about some things we did that helped us financially, but today I wanted to talk more about coping with unemployment. It can be difficult mentally, emotionally, spiritually, and even physically. I will admit that the first time we went through the roller coaster of unemployment, I did not cope very well. I was very stressed out and really had a hard time.

This time I was a lot less stressed out. I can't say for sure that I was praying more since I'm sure I was praying a lot last time too, but for whatever reason, this time I just felt like it would all work out and therefore I didn't need to get all worked up about it. The part that stressed me out the most was adding to our debt instead of paying it off like we'd planned- that was very frustrating.

I've learned over the years that finding the silver lining in a difficult experience makes it easier to handle. It doesn't necessarily make the experience enjoyable, but at least I can see a reason for it or something good that's coming out of it.

For example, with our first unemployment stint, we were living close to a lot of family and were able to spend more time with them before we moved halfway across the country from them. This was a great opportunity for Sunshine to spend time with her grandparents, some of her aunts and uncles, and some of her cousins. Growing up, we never spent much time around relatives because we usually lived far away from them. When we realized that Mr M's likely job opportunities were far from our families, we took advantage of the extra time with them.

This time around, I was able to leave the kiddos with Mr  and go running outside by myself. This gave the kiddos more time with their daddy and gave me time to run somewhere other than the treadmill. Having Mr M at home during the day was great for all of us since we got to see a lot more of him than if he was at work all day. This family togetherness was even more valuable since it was followed by Mr M being gone a lot with his current position. Since he wasn't driving the truck to work everyday, we were also saving a lot of gas money. 

As we searched for job openings, we found a potential job/location that we were previously unaware of (there's not a lot of options for his line of work). In looking into it, it appears to offer much more long-term job security and stability than what Mr M has been doing for the last five years. It's only because we were (and are) open to jobs pretty much anywhere that we even found out about this particular job opportunity since it's a rather random location. If we hadn't been looking for jobs, we never would have found it. This particular job has the added attraction of being in a location that has lower real estate prices than our current location, so we could actually afford to buy land and have a mini-farm. And now we have alerts programmed to let us know when job opportunities there become available.

While I've had lots of practice looking for silver linings (health issues, fertility issues, deployments, unemployment stints, etc), I still have to work at it. It's a conscious decision to focus on whatever positive aspect I can find rather than on the much more obvious negative aspects.

And that's not to say that focusing on the positive makes everything all better, because it doesn't. Life is still full of trials and troubles and we can't just sail past them.  I've seen that in my life- trials do not bring out the best in me. I wish they did, but they don't. Instead, I just tend to get stressed, cranky, irritable, and/or grumpy. I can maintain an overall-positive attitude in a situation, but the smaller issues still work their way under my skin.

So I'm a work in progress. How about you?

Preparing For Job Loss

I mentioned yesterday that I'd be sharing a couple posts about how we survived our second major unemployment period and what we've learned from the experiences.

We knew Mr M's job was not super secure- it's a fact of life in his line of work. Every year we face the question "will the money be there, or will people get laid off?" This past summer as that time drew near, everything felt more uncertain than it had in the past, so it wasn't a surprise when he did indeed get laid off.

Backing up a bit, though, there are some things we did beforehand (even before we really started worrying about him losing his job) that really helped us reduce our expenses when Mr M got laid off. Being prepared made the whole experience a little easier.

----------------

When Mr M returned from his last deployment, we had to choose which health insurance we wanted. Our options were a plan through his civilian company or Tricare through his guard unit. After comparing monthly premiums, deductibles, co-pays, cost shares, and so on, we decided to stick with Tricare. It's not wonderful, but it was cheaper than the other plan we were looking at, and we've been with Tricare off and on for most of our marriage and we know what to expect. Choosing Tricare meant that when Mr M was laid off by his civilian company we didn't have to scramble to find new coverage or pay out the nose for COBRA insurance. And when we unexpectedly got pregnant a couple months later, health insurance was not a concern since we still had our Tricare coverage.

----> obviously we're blessed that we had as many insurance choices as we did in the first place, but it also highlights the effect our financial decisions can have, even down the road a year or two.

-----------------

At the beginning of last summer I bought Sunshine's school books and the art supplies for a year's worth of art projects. This meant I didn't have to worry about buying them later on when our budget was a lot tighter.

Last summer I posted about decluttering and downsizing because we'd applied for an overseas job. We'd applied for the job since we knew Mr M's current job wasn't that secure, and the process started us decluttering, downsizing, and evaluating what we really needed. At the end of the summer we held a huge yard sale and sold a bunch of furniture and stuff that we just didn't need.

As part of the process, I also sorted all our clothing at the end of summer. I figured out what each child needed for fall/winter and purchased those items (luckily we had enough hand-me-downs that it we only needed to buy a few things). I also took some extra baby clothes to the consignment store and now we have store credit there for when we need a few things. Not having to buy clothes for 6 months was a huge budget saver.

----> knowing what we had and where it was kept us from buying items we already had, and selling what we didn't need brought in a little extra cash. Planning the kiddos' wardrobe ahead of time allowed me the leeway to find what we needed at good prices ($6 each for 2 pairs of jeans at Gymboree for Sunshine!)

----------------

We didn't cut out all of Sunshine's classes, but we did pay for the ones she took up front, since I knew we had the money at the beginning of the semester, but might not later on (we have the option of paying in installments). We continued her fiddle lessons and Irish music and dance classes, but skipped the expensive nature class (though we still hope to enroll her in it again in the near future).

We re-evaluated our budget in general as well as our food budget specifically and I made a concerted effort to change some of our shopping habits. I tend to overbuy our food so we always have a reserve, which is fine when we can afford to do so, but not good for the budget when the money is no longer available. On the other hand, that reserve sure came in handy and helped us lower our overall food expenses as we ate what was in the freezer and pantry.

I also tend to overbuy certain household items like cleaners (Amazon Subscribe and Save makes it too easy!) so we had plenty of laundry and dishwasher detergent stored as well. But I noticed there are some items we didn't have enough stored: namely ziplock baggies and trash bags.We also kept running out of toilet paper and diapers, though I did have stocks of those, just not enough. We don't use paper towels, and haven't since we switched to cloth years ago, so at least we didn't have to worry about constantly replacing those.

Our budget in general is already pretty streamlined, so there wasn't a lot of things we needed to eliminate from it. We don't have cable/satellite or a home phone, we don't drink coffee (expensive or otherwise), and we don't eat out on a regular basis, so all the "typical" cut-back areas in a budget aren't an issue for us. We could probably lower our cell phone bill a little, but I don't think it would be by much. I did cancel our monthly Amazon Subscribe and Save shipments since we were focusing on using what we had.

We also made the decision to sell some assets, namely our truck and travel trailer. This could have been a very difficult decision, but was actually an easy decision, since we'd already made the decision back at the beginning of the year with the intent of eventually buying an RV. While we still plan to buy an RV, the timeline for that has been pushed back. In the end, the trailer was sold just before Mr M was laid off, and we used the proceeds to pay off the truck loan and put the rest in savings. Eliminating the truck payment and having that savings cushion went a long way towards keeping me from stressing out when Mr M did indeed get laid off soon after that.

Eventually the money in savings went to pay bills and when we finally sold the truck in December it was a relief. We had enough money to buy a much more fuel efficient car (with cash) and still had some leftover for bills. Having a more fuel efficient car has also significantly lowered our gas budget since we're spending so much less and going so much further.

Even though we had started getting quotes to re-do our kitchen, we put that on hold since we knew it wasn't practical to spend money we didn't have, even if it would add value to our house. I also cut back on my projects and tried to focus on things that were free or inexpensive.

----> having items stored for future use eases a tight budget. Being willing to cut back and change spending habits can be hard, but it can also save money. Being willing to sell assets can be even more difficult, but can save money as well as bring in money.

-----------------

We still try to have fun, despite being on a limited budget, so we went ahead with two trips that had been planned before Mr M got laid off. I will admit that the only reason we were able to do so was that we'd already paid for the majority of the expenses for both trips, so we didn't have to spend too much more money when we actually went.

We had already paid our entrance and hotel fees for our Colonial Williamsburg trip, so we only had to pay for gas and food. Our food issues have made us good at planning ahead and eating as inexpensively as possible, even when staying in a hotel.

We had also already paid for our rental cabin and my half marathon entrance fee, so when we went to Tennessee we again only had to pay for gas and food. Since we stayed in a cabin with a full kitchen we brought most of our food and cooked it there and had only minimal food expenses for that trip.

After those trips were finished we didn't go anywhere expensive, but we still tried to do fun things as a family focusing on things that involved little to no money.

----> even when life is difficult it's important to stop and smell the roses. If we're just enduring, we're not enjoying. Which brings up tomorrow's topic: finding the silver lining in unemployment. Yes, there really can be one!

Unemployment Reprieve

Mr M has been working for the last couple months at a temporary position that will last for about another year. It was originally supposed to be just a month or so, which is why I didn't mention it sooner, but it got extended. It involves a lot of travel, but it's a steady paycheck, improves his skills for his resume, and gives us more time to find a more long-term job.

So we're not out of the job-hunting woods yet, but we do have a reprieve.

This isn't the first time Mr M has been unemployed, and we've learned some things along the way that I thought I'd share here.

In my next couple posts I'll be sharing how we survived our second major unemployment period and what we've learned from being unemployed. Maybe this will help someone who might read this, but maybe it's just here as a reminder of what we've learned. I don't know about you, but I forget things a lot quicker than I should.

Patio Progress

The last two weeks have been... how best to describe it? The best word I can come up with is "blech." River got sick about two and a half weeks ago, and at first I thought I'd gotten it as well, but my symptoms turned out to be the result of some cross-contamination issues. The symptoms weren't horrible (we're talking about a tiny amount of cross-contamination in a container of cumin), but they were uncomfortable and disrupted my sleep for several days before I recognized what was going on. The insomnia is what made me take a closer look at what was going on- insomnia has been an issue on the majority of the occasions I've gotten glutened (along with other issues, of course).

I didn't have River's cold, but my immune system was weakened, and I was sick within a week. My symptoms have stuck around a lot longer than usual, so I think my body is having a hard time fighting it off. Regardless, I've spent most of the last two weeks feeling less than up to par. I only managed a few hours of work on the patio the week before last and only about an hour last week, and I didn't manage any treadmill time at all. My physical energy levels have just been too low, though mentally I've been champing at the bit, wanting to get moving and be active again.

------------------

It's also been raining a lot the last few weeks, so even on the occasions that I did have the energy to work on the patio, it was frequently too wet for me to do anything. I did manage an hour or so on Friday the week before last in between rain showers, and Saturday was a gorgeous day, so I actually managed a solid 4-5 hours of work.

Friday I got the small section of joists in before River lost it and needed to go inside, which ended up coinciding with another rain shower, so it all worked out. He loves being outside, but he still wasn't feeling well and needed to lay down for a nap.

You can't see his face, but River was not happy. 

You can see the small section where I got the joists hung before the meltdown.

Saturday I got most of the rest of the joists cut and installed. I miscalculated on how many I needed- the whole "on center" thing needed to include my framework, which made everything a bit wider than I had originally calculated. Something I'll keep in mind for future builds to make sure I don't end up with an extra joist spaced close to another.

I had two 3' pieces of 2x6 in the shed that I used for the shorter section close to the house, but I had to buy a 12' board to cut the last two longer joists I needed. I also needed to buy more joist hangers- I ran short since I hadn't counted on two additional joists. And I also ran out of nails, so between the three items at least it wasn't a wasted trip to Lowe's.

The two boards resting on top are cut to length, but I ran out of joist hangers.

I needed two more 6' boards in that section.

While I was working, I attached the last two uprights for the pergola to the patio frame, then attached scrap wood near the tops for added stability. When I add all the upper pieces to the pergola I'll adjust all the uprights so they're as upright and straight as possible. For now I just want them to stay in place and not wobble around.

Pergola supports up.

The joists took longer than I thought they would/should. They're not difficult to cut and install, they're just tedious and time consuming. Measure, cut, attach joist hangers, nail each joist in the frame, repeat. and repeat. and repeat....

I also added some 4x4 posts between the house foundation and the patio frame. The space was just a bit wider than I felt would be a good support for the decking. I couldn't get the frame any closer to the foundation though because of the deck blocks, which left an awkwardly wide space. If I'd thought about it ahead of time, I could have attached an extra 2x6 to the frame, but I would have had to do it way back when I was attaching all the frame pieces to each other. Since I didn't think about it until the frame was all firmly attached to each other, that wasn't an option. The 4x4 posts rest on the deck blocks, with small 2x6 spacers to bring the posts up to the frame height.

You can see the 4x4s between the foundation and the patio frame.

That was Saturday afternoon and Monday morning River's cold had hit me and I was not feeling good. After a week spent on the couch and my bed, I couldn't handle the inactivity anymore and it was bugging me that the joists were almost, but not quite, done. So despite not feeling good, I forced myself to go out this past Saturday afternoon to finish hanging the joists and adding the nails that I'd had to skip when I initially attached the joists to the frame. After hanging half of them I had realized I wasn't going to have enough nails so I'd used the bare minimum to hold everything in place so I could get as many joists hung as possible. It took less than an hour to finish off the joists and add the nails, which was good since that was as much as I could handle physically. It was nice to get outside and enjoy some fresh air and sunshine though.

Last four joists hung and all missing nails added in.

I had hoped to square off the frame this past week, but that will be the first thing I do this week. I was not quite as successful as I wanted to be in keeping the patio square- it's harder than it looks! Since I also want to bring the frame width out to the edges of the deck blocks, I'll kill two birds with one stone.

At this point we're all feeling better (Sunshine got the bug too, but not nearly as badly as River and me), but have lingering coughs that still don't feel good. I'm hopeful that this week I'll feel well enough to spend some time on the treadmill and to make more progress on the patio. Now if the weather will just cooperate also...

Running with Two Littles

I've been contemplating how this little one will change things for us- Mr M and I will finally be out-numbered and we'll have two under two for a short time- and it'll affect my running habits as well.

I've been doing a lot of treadmill running since River was born, but I prefer running outside. It's much easier for me to stay motivated when I'm breathing fresh air than when I'm running in place, going nowhere. We live on narrow roads, so while I have on occasion taken Sunshine on a run with me, I haven't done it with River because I just don't feel comfortable doing it. Though it would be easier with him since he's so much smaller than her. I'd like to start running outside more, but it'll mean loading everything and everyone in the car and driving to another location, dropping Sunshine off somewhere along the way since she can't run fast enough to keep up with me. A lot of hassle just to go on a run, and not likely to actually happen.

On the other hand, I have been hitting the bike paths in town with River while Sunshine is at Irish music class, so it does happen on occasion if it's in conjunction with other planned activities and I've dressed appropriately.

One of these days Sunshine will be old enough that I can go for a run and leave her at home, but I'd still have to take the two littles with me, which means we'd have to retire our single BOB for a double stroller. BOB has been such a great investment- we bought it practically new from a family on craigslist when Sunshine was about 3 months old, and we have gotten a lot of use out of it over the years. We used it a lot more with Sunshine than with River, but we still use it with him.

I've been researching double jogger strollers and I have to admit I'm not super happy with the options. I like the idea of the Phil +Ted in that it's only the width of a single stroller, but from all accounts it's not actually supposed to be used for running. Plus I don't like that one kiddo is always stuck in the back, unable to see.

image source

The InStep Safari Double Tandem Stroller seems like a better option, though it hasn't been made for a few years, so I'd be stuck with what I can find on craigslist. From what I can tell, it was originally sold at a pretty good (i.e., not super-expensive) price. The second seat is raised up, allowing the child in back to have a better view.

image source

The Mountain Buggy Plus One seems pretty similar to the InStep Safari Double Tandem, but is a lot more expensive, even more expensive than some of the BOB double joggers. Reviews were pretty consistent in saying that the footwell for the rear seat was very small, making it difficult to get the child's feet in and out.

image source

Which leads me back to BOB. They don't make an inline double jogger, just the standard side-by-side double jogger. The real issue I have with the wider width is how much more space it will take on our narrow roads and the non-existent side of the road that's really the barrow pit that you have to steer into when passing vehicles don't give you any space.

image source

Baby Jogger also makes a side-by-side double jogger with a front wheel that swivels or can be locked in place, but if I were to choose a side-by-side, I'd stick with what we know, BOB. BOB makes joggers with fixed front wheels or front wheels that can swivel or be locked in place. Our single BOB has a fixed wheel and I'm used to steering with it, but supposedly being able to swivel the front wheel can be super handy when you're steering through crowds. Though the double jogger is wide enough that it won't fit through a lot of spaces, so I'm not sure how much that actually helps.

image source

I'm probably leaning toward a fixed wheel BOB Duallie, but I'll wait till the little one is a few months old and then find a store that sells several models/brands so I can test them in real life. We may end up moving in a year or so, and maybe we'll end up somewhere with safer roads or paths for me to take the kiddos on. So maybe all my worrying is for nothing. As it usually is :)

--------------

I wrote the above section a month or so ago, with the intent of adding a bit more to it and then hitting "post".

However, I got sidetracked while looking for strollers to test out. After some more thought, I decided I probably wouldn't be doing much running with the stroller and I didn't really want the bulk of the side-by-side joggers. Much as I don't really enjoy the treadmill, it is much more convenient at this point in my life for everyday workouts. In a couple years I may be able to run more outside, but at that point Sunshine will be old enough to stay home and watch the kiddos, or I can just take the baby with me in BOB. So I decided not to worry too much about the jogging capabilities of the strollers we were considering.

After researching availability, we found a local store that had a Phil + Teds Navigator in stock. I couldn't find any stores that carried the Mountain Buggy Plus One (and the Safari InStep is no longer made). We went and tried out the Navigator in person since there's only so much you can see online. Moving seats around and trying out the different configurations (they claim 26 different options!) convinced us that it would work well for us. Sunshine was convinced before me and started pointing out all the reasons we should get it :) One point she really liked was how easily she was able to push and steer it (the fixed wheel on BOB makes him a lot harder to push and steer).

image source

I was worried about my legs bumping into the lower back seat, but that wasn't a problem, even when I tried jogging a little. Though I do have a rather short stride, so some people may have a problem with that. The handle is adjustable, which is great when one spouse (me) is super short and the other spouse (Mr M) is super tall. Our 9-year-old BOB does not have an adjustable handle, though I believe some of the newer models do.

Phil + Ted strollers are pricey, but we were able to buy it when the double kit was being thrown in for free, which saved us $150 bucks. I had planned on waiting until summer or fall to buy a new stroller, but since we didn't want to miss out on the sale, we ended up buying it in March.

Because of all the seating options, we're using it as a single stroller for now and will be able to so again when River outgrows the stroller but the baby is still small enough to need it. So we anticipate many years of use, which will make it worth the money we spent. And that swivel front wheel does make it super maneuverable. I hadn't realized what a difference that makes, but it really does. The swivel wheel can be locked in place, but there's still some play in it, so it will never be as rigid as the BOB fixed wheel. I'm guessing this is why Phil + Ted strollers aren't marketed as jogging strollers, though I could be wrong, since BOB swivel wheels are also lockable and they're still marketed as joggers. Phil + Ted stroller frames don't seem quite as heavy duty as the BOB stroller frames, so perhaps that's a contributing factor. It'll be interesting to see how Phil's frame holds up.

One thing I've noticed is that Phil folds smaller than BOB. I can get both into the trunk of the Camry Hybrid (like a lot of hybrid sedans, they have small trunks because of the batteries), but Phil takes up less space and I don't have to take any wheels off. BOB will fit, but I have to remove the front wheel and it doesn't fold quite as flat.

So for now Phil stays in the Camry and BOB stays in the CRV. Whichever car we happen to be in, we can go for a walk if the opportunity arrises. When the baby is born, he'll get strapped to my chest for awhile when we go on walks. Because one seat can be laid down flat, he'll be able to ride in Phil from an early age, though I like keeping my babies close when they're young. Once both kiddos start riding  in Phil on a regular basis BOB will get retired to the shed until he's needed again.

And I think Phil will get lots of use with two little boys less than two years apart- the ability to keep them contained and easily transport them from place to place will definitely come in handy when we're out and about.

-------------

Have you used a double jogger or stroller? What did you like? What did you not like? What would you do differently if you had to do it again?

18 Months

why do you always take pictures?   (and yes, he really needs a haircut)

no pictures please!

River recently hit the 18 month mark, so I thought I'd share an update on him since I haven't done one since he turned a year old. He's such a fun little boy and we're so glad he's part of our family!

He likes Legos (the Duplo size), but he can't put them back together- he can only pull them apart. So he brings them to me to put together, then he pulls them apart, then we repeat the process.

River reading the children's dictionary that he's decided he likes. The only problem is that it's almost as big as him and he can barely carry it around. He's whacked himself in the face with it, and he's dropped it on his toes, both of which were very upsetting experiences.

He loves books and has a few definite favorites. He still doesn't really like us to read them to him, though. He prefers to read them on his own terms. So we paraphrase quickly the pages he'll let us read and skip the rest.

River is a happy little boy, and mischievous, though not in a malicious way. Other than throwing food off his tray when he's done eating. We're working on that one still. He likes to hide from us, and has started running away when we call his name- he thinks it's a big game.

playing the "piano" on daddy's iPad- his favorite app ever

A few weeks ago, River noticed the chorister at church waving his arm around, and he's started waving his arm around when he hears music. So cute!

He still takes two naps most days. Sunshine gave up her morning nap by 6 months, but took a 3 hour nap every afternoon. River generally takes a 2 hour nap in the late morning and another 45 minute-1 hour nap in the late afternoon.  He sleeps for at least 12 hours at night, but he's still a very, very light sleeper. When I check on him before I go to bed, I have to be absolutely quiet- sometimes just the rustle of my pants is enough to wake him up. And that's with the white noise machine in the background. I'm really hoping the new baby isn't a light sleeper also because we never intended for our kids to have their own rooms. We'll try the baby in Sunshine's room, just like we did with River, and I really hope he's a deeper/heavier sleeper.

running around outside

He loves being outside. He has a pair of nubby rubber-soled shoes that he wears outside when the ground is damp since the leather-soled shoes get wet, and he always hands those to me in the mornings to put on him. He'll stand at the door and try to reach the handle and make noises indicating he wants to go out.

one of his favorite spots to sit and read books- in front of the door to the deck

He doesn't talk (intelligibly) yet, but is quite good at making himself understood most of the time. We've been teaching him some sign language and he uses those to communicate along with grunts, noises, and finger points. He can actually be very talkative, it just isn't in English :)  Despite not talking, he's very curious about everything and asks questions about them.

He's finally getting a little snuggly. He'll give hugs, but he still is not a snuggler like Sunshine. Different personalities, different preferences.

his version of a snuggle- Sunshine is under the blanket

He loves baths and playing in the water. Sunshine took a few years to warm up to water, but River has always loved it. Right now I'm waiting for consistently warm weather so I can fill our sand and water table. I know he'll get soaking wet, so I don't want it to be too chilly outside.

"helping" Sunshine with her schoolwork :)

He loves Sunshine and likes to hang out with her and follow her around. He's definitely in the monkey-see-monkey-do mode and tries to do what she does.

Mr M has done some traveling lately, so we've done a good amount of Skyping. Anytime my phone rings he asks if "Da" is calling, and if he hears the Skype tones on my laptop he comes running. He also likes to control my laptop. He pulls it close to him (the first picture below) and then starts banging around on the keyboard, like he's typing. It's cute and funny, though just a little annoying when he doesn't want to relinquish control of my computer to me.

It's neat to see how much he's learned and progressed in the last year and a half, and we're excited to see how much he learns in the next year and a half, and beyond.

The Half Marathon I Didn't Run

As I said before, I decided not to run the half marathon that I spent so much time training for. It was held this past Saturday, and I have to admit that in the end I was only a little disappointed not to be running. The long runs were harder on my pregnant body than I realized until I stopped doing them. Adding to that, Saturday we woke up to rather high winds and temps in the 50s. Temps in the 50s would have been great for running, but that wind would have been brutal, especially since I'm sure the uphills would have been into the wind as well. Because that's how things work out, right?

I did pick up my race packet on Friday- I paid for it, after all. This is only the second race that I've registered for and not run. The last one was the Turkey Trot I was supposed to run in 9th grade. I got hit by a van the night before, and while I was mobile, I was in no condition to run 5 miles. I guess being 25 weeks pregnant is almost as good an excuse as getting hit by a car :)

Last week, with the pressure off, I didn't hit the treadmill once, and it was quite nice. Not to say I sat on the couch all day, though. Building the basement patio has been a workout of a different sort, and despite all the bending, standing, and lifting, my left glute hasn't been bothering me too much. This has surprised me since I fully expected my glute pain to continue being an issue. Apparently walking/running is more aggravating to that nerve than bending and lifting. Unexpected. Though shoveling dirt for a level surface for the rest of the framework did aggravate my hips and glute.

dirt waiting to be shoveled around the deck blocks and out of the patio area

frame finished and dirt removed- ready to start adding the interior joists

An unforeseen side effect is that despite eating the same as previous weeks, I seem to have put on more weight than in the past, so I need to find a good balance between treadmill time and outdoor project time. I guess treadmill time really does help me maintain my weight. I've said for years now that running helped me maintain my weight, but to see such obvious proof of that has been a bit startling (and frustrating since I don't need to gain much weight since I started out the pregnancy overweight).

-------------------------

I had planned on hitting the bike path with River on Tuesday while Sunshine was at Irish music class, but he fell asleep right before we pulled into the parking lot. Since that was his first nap all day, I wasn't about to wake him up. Luckily I had done some walking when we were at the park, so it wasn't a complete loss.

Monday- rest day
Tuesday- repeatedly retrieved River from the far reaches of the soccer field Sunshine was flying a kite on
Wednesday- carried, placed, and dug in deck blocks
Thursday- finished digging in deck blocks, leveled deck blocks, and cut 2x6's to length
Friday- leveled one corner of the deck, attached frame pieces to each other with joist hangers and angle braces, attached two posts for future pergola
Saturday- leveled other corner of deck, finished attaching frame pieces to each other with joist hangers and angle braces, shoveled out excess dirt in preparation for installing the internal joists.

Total mileage for the week: unknown, but there was a good bit of walking back and forth as I leveled, cut, and put everything in place. I need to start wearing my fitbit again so I can track that better. I have a hard time keeping it in place in the charger, so I got frustrated and stopped charging it. Any suggestions?

Sunday Funny

blue raspberry lollipop face and hands

The other day River had his first lollipop. It was a small dum dum lollipop that was blue raspberry flavored. Probably the worst flavor/color combo for a small child, but he loved it!

A Calmer Week

Hug ambush courtesy of River

Last week was crazy busy, but this week we didn't have too many things on our calendar and it's been so nice. Of course, next week is busy again...

Monday we did some spring cleaning/organizing, which mostly meant we cleaned out closets and took winter gear to the basement. Our coat closet was out of control, so it was definitely necessary.

Tuesday we actually made it to park day, which we haven't managed in awhile since it usually interferes with River's nap time. River decided not to take a nap though, so that wasn't an issue. I think he was looking forward to going to the park, which I made the mistake of telling him would happen after nap time. Sunshine had fun flying her kite and River had fun walking all over the soccer field- he thought he was such a big kid.

River warily approaching Sunshine- he got attacked by her kite on more than one occasion

Wednesday there was nothing on the calendar, so after schoolwork, we went to Lowe's and purchased the first round of materials for a ground-level patio outside the basement door. I've gotta take advantage of the nice weather (i.e., not hot, muggy, and buggy), so I got started right away getting the  deck blocks in place. Yesterday evening I also made River a new tie to wear with his Easter sweater- I'll post pictures next week.

I meant to take a before picture, but didn't remember till after the deck blocks were in place. There was no way I was moving them all out of the way just for a picture, so this is as good as it gets for now. I know I have a better picture somewhere, but I'm not going to dig it out right now.

I got half the deck blocks dug in on Wednesday

Today I finished the digging in the deck blocks and cut the wood to length. I didn't quite get everything as level as I wanted, but I ran out of time because River woke up from his nap, so I called it good. We even had time to help a friend pick up a freezer. Since we didn't have anything else planned, I didn't stress about how long it took (longer than expected, of course).

Deck blocks dug in, boards cut to size, and everything mostly level.

Lots to do still, but a good start.

Tomorrow I'll finish leveling everything and use brackets and joist hangers to attach all the wood pieces to each other. As long as it's not raining when River is sleeping, anyway. Scattered showers means it's inevitable that it will be raining when I can actually be out working.

After how stressed I've been lately, this week has been a refreshing change. Sure, Tuesday was our usual busy day, but it wasn't terrible, and while there will be several hours tomorrow where we'll be running all over, for the most part, this week has been nice and non-stressful. I've been so much more productive (working on projects) this week than I feel like I've been in awhile. It's a good reminder to me why I shouldn't cram our schedule full, though I can't always control what ends up on our calendar.